An Email

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the hallskids were more than just stirring, they were bouncing off walls.The stockings were crooked; the Scotch tape was no more(The kids had just used it to tape the dog to the door.)The children were amped. "We're not tired!" they said.But their cries were soon silenced with a loud "GO TO BED!" And Mom in her sweatpants and Dad with his shearshad just settled in to wrap the rest of the gear.When out of the kitchen, they heard a faint crinkling.Mom screamed, "What the heck?!" but Dad had an inkling.And sure enough, it was Santa, looking quite cheeredwith handfuls of corn chips and dip on his beard."Why, Santa," Dad said, "What's up with this visit? It seems a bit early. It's not midnight yet, is it?""You caught me," he said. "I need a time out.Do you need one too? I'll get the elves to help out.""On Clooney! On Cruise! On Mary-Kate! On Ashley!Come Jolie-Pitts, Come J.Lo! Beyoncé and Jay-Z!!"Then that awesome Santa said, “Better not pout!”And poured Mom and Dad drinks so they could chill out! "Santa's elves are all here the wrapping's on us!You just wake up tomorrow, without any fuss!"Mom and Dad sprinted upstairs. (Need not ask them twice!)And chillaxed with a movie. Now, isn't that nice? Of course, this is fiction. Beyoncé’s not on her way.And neither is Clooney. (But the Olsen twins may!)There are still stockings to stuff and so much more to doBut it’s nice to know that most parents are up all night too.So we'll leave you with this, after our silly caper.Those famous midnight words: "Honey, we're out of wrapping paper!"